i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
