so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Send help, water and tortillas.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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