It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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