Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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