I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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