ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Reggie can tackle my bush.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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