if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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