What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize