Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
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