You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
