Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
sex in a hospital.. check
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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