that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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