im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
where are my eyebrows?
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
