never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
What a dumb baby whore.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
