it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
