So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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