Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize