Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
