Its about making memories worth repressing
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
