Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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