Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
So gin and wine won't be happening again
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
