Already got asked if we're dating
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
