youre lurking in front of me
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
