It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
