There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
We need a shit load of segways right now
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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