I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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