she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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