You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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