we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
worst night to have a conscience
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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