just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
