We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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