Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
