We're facebook friends in real life
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
