Swine flu. Run for my life!
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
