New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Brb crying the tears of my youth
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
