I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
