quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
