ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
worst night to have a conscience
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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