Having a random hookup so left but love u
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
