So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
