One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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