he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
