I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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