I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
