hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Are my feet made of real feet?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
