My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
babies were throwing up all over the place
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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