where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
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