I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
