i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
We are all done wearing pants today
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize