Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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