Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
