So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
