I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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